Are external factors defining who you are?

It is really easy to let external factors define who we are. Especially the traumatic ones. I know, I’ve been there… There will always be things in our lives that impact us negatively. Some of them a lot. And it can be really easy to become bitter or sad and live your life like that. But here’s the important […]

Using pain and pleasure to form habits

Achieving something regularly, especially when it comes to building a new habit, involves motivation. Motivating yourself daily can be hard – life gets in the way, things stop being quite as interesting, you lose the initial zeal, and so on… But there are ways to ensure that you stick to the habit, which is where […]

One yes is all you need

Success nearly always is a numbers game – you have to get through many no’s before you get a yes. But then… Then it snowballs. Like it did for Colonel Sanders. He travelled around the country and was rejected over and over. Until he got a yes. And that yes led to KFC, one of […]

Choosing right over easy

Doing the right thing isn’t always easy. But that makes it even more important to do them, because choosing easy over right leads you down a road you will regret. Choosing right always trumps choosing easy, especially in the long term. Right is what leads you to a better life. Right is what leads you […]

My 5 step framework for effectively dealing with anxiety and stress

Anxiety and stress are experienced by everyone. No one really is completely immune to anxiety. We all feel it, and that’s not a bad thing. Anxiety is a survival mechanism – it helped us survive, and still does. Without a bit of anxiety, we would stop being vigilant, and become too complacent. But it becomes […]

Where you are born matters, but…

Where we are born has a huge impact on our future. And the quality of our lives. Those born in the West have a much better quality of life, and prospects, than those born elsewhere. This is generalising of course, but by and large this is the truth for a huge portion of the population. […]

Two things to try when you are in a bad mood

Pretending to not be in a bad mood… Does not really work. You can smile to hide your anger, but that does not get rid of your anger. You can fake being enthusiastic, but that does not get rid of your frustration. You can act like you are happy, but that does not get rid […]

If you are trying to please everyone, you need to know this

Trying to please everyone is an impossible goal. Because you can NEVER please everyone. Even the nicest people in the world have haters (think Ned Flanders in the Simpsons…). Even the most successful people in the world have people who don’t like or admire them (just think about the number of haters people like Bill […]

The five things you can control

Life is unpredictable. You can’t control a lot of things. In fact, most things in life you can’t control. But here are 5 things you can control: 1. Your thoughts 2. Your words 3. Your choices 4. Your actions 5. Your reactions Focus on what you can control, rather than wasting time and energy on […]