Your idea of the ideal

It is better to live the life you really truly want to live.
And be who you want to be.

Much better than having expectations of yourself based on your idea of the ideal.
Or societal expectations.
Or other people’s expectations.

Sometimes it’s important to realise what YOU want.

I’ve had first hand experience with this. I studied law for 2 years, even though my heart wasn’t in it. The second year I missed my exam 3 times. All I kept doing was pushing it as giving up wasn’t an acceptable option. My best friend at the time asked some great questions which made me think about it, but I didn’t believe it was an appropriate option to even consider at the time – because not carrying on was tantamount to giving up, and that wasn’t me.
On the day of the exam, I was late, the bus I took broke down half way. I was on the next one, still thinking I could make it. Then we got stuck in the traffic, back to back, with no sign of any movement. I was stressed out of my mind.
And then I had a moment of profound clarity: not continuing with university was ok. And it was like a huge weight was lifted. A massive one.

I could have carried on, become a barrister.
But it would have been for the wrong reasons, and I would have been miserable.
It was a moment of clarity that helped me rise above the guilt and expectation that was driving me before, and was stopping me from doing what I wanted.
I went in to pursue a career in business, and social justice. Both of which I genuinely enjoyed.

Often we get bogged down and pursue things we don’t really like or want to.
Not because we want to, but because we think we need to.
A lot of times we get desolate about the things we aren’t doing but should – things we aren’t doing, but want to.

So here’s my advice, something for you to try today:
Sit down and re-evaluate your priorities. Are they your priorities for the right reason?
Why are you doing/want to do what you’re doing/want to do?

This thought exercise can be revelatory.
Even life changing.

Live the life you’d rather be living.
As opposed to trying to live an idealistic version of one, just because you think you “should”.

Be true to yourself.
Think.

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