Cycle of good

Being good to others is a state of mind.
It’s a habit that can be developed and nurtured, like any other habit.

When you do good things for others without any expectations, you create a virtuous cycle.
The other person feels good.
You feel good.
And so on.

But it doesn’t just stop there.
The positive feedback from doing good will usually lead to more good being done, both by you and others.
You will start a cycle of good.

Isn’t that better than the piles of negativity, stress, and bad most people are surrounded by?

It’s good to do good.

Try it.
Do something good today, even if it is something as simple as smiling at others and opening the door for someone.

Start small.
Build on it.
Rinse and repeat.

Let’s create a virtuous cycle, a cycle of good.

Shitty experiences don’t justify shitty actions

Often people justify doing bad things based on bad things that have happened in their lives.
They blame their past for their actions.
They act as if they had no choice.

But the truth is, there’s always a choice.
What you do and who you are ultimately is a decision – your decision.
If you choose to do good, you will do good, no matter how bad things might have been for you.
And vice versa.

Don’t go bad as a result of your pain.
And suffering
And anguish.
And anger.
No matter what happens in your life, never let them influence you to do bad things.

Yes bad things happen.
It’s unfortunate, but they don’t have the power to turn you into someone you don’t want to be – unless you let them.
Don’t let your struggles create a dark version of you.

Let your light shine, no matter your struggles, or challenges.
If anything, let them make you stronger.
Use those experiences to make a difference, and do better.
Who better to know what not to do and what to do better than someone who has suffered?

Be you, and better.
Not worse.
Do not let what happened in your past make you a worse version of you.

Like they say, life gives you lemons…

You have a choice.
Choose good.
Do good.
Be good.

What (ultimately) does not make you happy

Being selfish doesn’t make you happy, ultimately.
Unless, of course, you are a narcissist or a sociopath…

When you are the only person you think about, everything you do is to only benefit yourself.
That’s a very narrow-minded, and short-term view of life.
That’s a mindset that doesn’t benefit the world, and won’t even benefit you in the long term (even though you might think it will).
And that certainly is not how you make the world a better place.

If you want to make a difference, and leave the world a better place, you can’t just focus on taking, you’ll need to give as well.
Being selfish is a bad decision even from self-preservation and self-benefit point of view because if you don’t give, you will stop getting.

Take care of yourself, absolutely, but don’t just focus on yourself.
Give more than you take.

Make politeness the default

“Life is too fucking short to be an asshole.”
If I remember correctly, that’s something I heard from Louis CK.
It’s a sentiment I wholeheartedly agree with.

I’ve written about the importance of politeness before.
Growing up, the importance of good manners, respect and politeness was emphasised – respect more than others.
I vividly remember the plaque my grandfather had on politeness…

In my linear brain and black and white thinking, politeness takes up quite a bit of import.
That’s the default position as far as I’m concerned.
At the end of the day, what’s the point of not being polite, and why won’t you be?

It doesn’t take much to be polite.
It’s an easy thing to do, and has huge upsides.
It makes your, and everyone else’s life, better.
Life is short, so why not make politeness your default response?

That said, I do have exceptions, namely if someone is being an asshole.
Then I’m often the biggest asshole they’ve ever come across.

I can be better though.
I’m working on being more patient…
But apart from those instigators and stupid situations, politeness always is my default.
I’m in no way perfect, but I do try, and will continue to do so.

Politeness is a great default response to have.
Life gets better for everyone when politeness is the default.
So make it your default.

Above all, don’t be an asshole.
Life really is too fucking short.

Different is good

Too often we get hung up over things like race, religion, sexuality, and so on.

The differences separate.
They create segregation instead of the integration that humanity as a whole needs.

People get hung up over their identities as defined by the colour of their skin, the place they were born in, their sexual orientation, the religion they follow, etc.
Which is fine, as long as they are not used those as excuses to look down on people who are different.

Differences aren’t a bad thing.
On the contrary, they provides us an opportunity to learn, and grow, and see things from a different (often better) perspective.
They enable us to broaden our horizons.

More importantly, when you dig deep, there are more similarities than differences.
There are more reasons to unite, and collaborate, than to segregate and separate.

Thankfully things have gotten much better, and people have become smarter and more open minded.
But there’s still much to be done.

Do your bit.
Open your mind.
Embrace the differences, and celebrate them.